e-bae:

Told this girl to text me when she got home… I think she homeless

(via bacon-with-cheese)

bewbin:

Send me would rathers

bussykiller:

precumming:

what if you got a dollar for everytime you masturbated 

image

(via forever-the-youngest-kids)

rememberrbuckybarnes:

tauriel2fab4u:

tauriel2fab4u:

IM MAKING A PIE AND I ACCIDENTALLY PUT IODINE IN IT INSTEAD OF VANILLA EXTRACT

I ALMOST FED THIS PIE TO MY FAMILY
I WAS GOING TO FEED THIS PIE TO MY CLASSMATES

I WAS ABOUT TO MURDER PEOPLE THROUGH PIE

LIKE LOOK AT THIS FUCKING PIE

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DOESNT IT LOOK NICE

DONT YOU WANT TO EAT IT

TOO FUCKING BAD ITS POISONOUS YOU’LL DIE

HOW DO YOU MIX UP IODINE AND VANILLA EXTRACT

WHY DO YOU HAVE IODINE IN THE KITCHEN

WHY DO YOU HAVE IT AT ALL

WHY

(via forever-the-youngest-kids)

heathicorn:

apparently some guy named mark was trying to tell my mom he needed to speak with my dad about any financial transactions my mom was making because he was the man of the house and she did not take kindly to his implying that my dad was the primary breadwinner/person in charge in our family so

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(via lananotdelrey)